Still I am going to keep coming back to the FB image about Working vs welfare refrig and not showing because all it accomplished was sensationalism of a real problem.

Rather, it so clearly demonstrates (at least to me) the Symptom and Consequences (not the least of which is hate and class “envy”).

Nor does it offer any insight in the why/cause and ultimately the solution

Whether the image was accurate or not is not important because all it does is further divide and offers no thought about the cause or possible solutions.

There is absolutely NO REASON why legitimate citizens of the United States of America should be hungry.
Or that Farmers should be paid NOT to grow a crop
Or that food grown in the US should be sent outside its borders as foreign aid (ok maybe some for disaster relief situations)

I kept looking at that picture and then started doing some research. So much information is on the Internet.

What if INSTEAD we looked back at programs that did work even if they expected some responsible behavior in exchange for that hand UP –

“Back in the 70’s” when I lived in NY – Westchester County tried to create what they called “WorkFare”
I remember it, because our small family business attempted to participate. That is a whole other story in itself, but for now let’s focus a bit on “solutions”

The concept was that those receiving benefits were found “appropriate” work. It was what would be called “honest work”. Among the means used was child care so that a single parent could participate

If I remember correctly (or maybe I just think it should be part of any hand up concept) It required that all receiving benefits participate – no hand outs.

There were provisions for child care (and some of the mothers were “aids” who brought their child under school age to “work” )

child of school age were expected to be in school. Reached that magic age of 16 and quit school – no more WIC, no food stamp allowance AND reduced other benefits (housing allowance)

No acquiescing to bullying by the by race baiters into unequal treatment. On Drugs, get into a program (methadone clinics were popular) or no help.

On drugs, not in a program, okay, then you get involuntary commitment as a danger to oneself and to others.

No job, okay you are assigned “honest work” suitable to your ability. And, job training was part of that program as well. Teaching of work ethic and requiring the practice of good working habits.

Get into trouble and find your family removed from the “projects” and off the “section 8” rolls. Every major city has “empty” real estate that could be made useful for housing and with thoughtful tax incentives including responsible supervision – or, as “used to be common” working with church organizations to create safe places for those in need.

Just some starting points. But something to talk about, somethings to make important if you really want change for the better.

and yes, coming soon, more about that refrig image and why it looks that way and how to make it different.

Today is father’s day in the US. There is so much I have to thank my parents for, but perhaps the most important thing was teaching a sense of personal responsibility for my own actions.

They also were kind of big on doing something rather than whining.

Recently I saw a thing with a picture of what was supposed to be a middle class working family refrig vs a “welfare household”
I did not share it, but have been thinking about it so started doing some research. Recently I saw one of the “social commentary” FB placards about how you or I would have been DEVASTATED if our “diary” was found and read and worse yet, SHARED by a sibling WITH ANYONE>
Now we have an increasing population who really believe that how often they have a BM – it should be shared.
We see almost no conversation about the cause and effect of infantizing and less about teaching morals and ethics.

Instead we see the glorification of bad behavior and teaching of hate and division rantings instead of finding and listening to and working for real solutions however long it takes to get it done.

Sure there is a huge “temptation” to not look away from the train wreck – but why and are we not contributing to the problem when we assist in spreading hate instead of finding real solutions and working to attain or at least introduce them to the current society.

It is not simple and depending on who you listen to – at least in the US, the slide on this slippery slope began in the 30’s or mid-60’s

Growing up in the 50’s, and early 60’s was not all that different except that the majority culture was accepting responsibility for one’s own actions.

Explanations are well and good and maybe comforting – looking at the symptoms is no cure for the disease = excusing the responsible parties.

and again, there are no simple solutions.
it all seems irreversible – unless, maybe if good people start standing up to the bullies, refuse to be intimidated by the baiters and accept that change is possible, but it will take time to reverse the damages.

Let’s stop lamenting, at the very least look at the causes and then KEEP talking about those causes and consequences and the small steps each of us can take individually and collectively to effect change

feel free to share your thoughts by commenting on this and yes, more to come related rant and rambling

“They” (I can hear my father now – “WHO IS THEY” ) say that one should not make “big” decisions for at least a year after some major event – birth of a child, marriage, divorce, death of a loved one, major change in circumstances – losing a job – starting a new job, stock market crashes – identity theft, and certainly while under the influence of mood altering medications.

Some choices do have to be made under the trying conditions created by major changes – be those change good or bad = sorrowful or joyful.

Still I have come to believe while maybe one should not actively implement those decisions if there is “time” to consider, one should make a note of what might a moment of unusual clarity for what really matters and how best to get there – preferably without burning too many bridges in case of a need to retreat.

Besides, some constructive “What If” thinking can often lead one down interesting lines of thought.

Appearances can be deceiving and policing is not different – both involve human beings – except for the explanation that nothing exists in a vacuum.

Yet, Expansions should not be used as an Excuse. A frame of reference, perhaps grounds for forgiveness, but never a reason for bad behavior (mine or another’s ) – If your gut reaction is to read no further in fear of unpleasant observation – please do stop. But, if you want to think about Solutions instead of Excuses, let’s consider talking about it.

Earlier this week we watched the premiere of the TV series Aquarius – and shortly after the evening news featuring sensational TV personalities interviewing residents of “inner City” Baltimore – the jury is still out on the show – I do not know where the writers plan to take this, but they are certainly setting a background and based on my life experiences, possible accurate – it is going to be about how they choose to use it – Explanation or Excuse.

The character building most certainly brought back memories and they were not all good – but you might be surprised where I found “something to hope for”

An explanation possibly worth examining in the interview was my gut reaction to the “situation” the presented as each garnered their 15 seconds of fame, the residents presented a startlingly clear picture of what is wrong and maybe even how to fix it.

Lining and working primarily in the NY Metro area in the 60’s and 70’s (and well pretty much all my life) – growing up in a typical working class neighborhood undergoing change – read that moving from a balanced (based on census data) mostly white moving to mostly black and finally today it remains so with pockets of Hispanics.

Among the things I learned in life is that God always finds a way to give us what we deserve.

In the interview, and by way of explanation – anyone individual living there who said anything else would have to be suicidal – but reference to the “Code” and how “You don’t help the police”

Well, any cop with half a brain in their head and a decent Training officer from rookie to chief knows you do not solve crime without leads, and you cannot protect with out cooperation.

So here is one of the surprises – I am an admirer of Malcolm X and consider his assignation one of the greatest losses to best long term interests of the Black community than Martin Luther King.

Certainly I did not agree with all of Malcolm’s recommended solutions and his plans to achieve those goals – but certainly he had ideas and ideals worth examining. I am so sorry that more of today’s angry young men of all races are denied by divisionist race baiters from knowing more than entertainment TV masquerading as “news” makers and reporters allow.

Why? well if you watched Aquarius, you saw the same thing he did – YES there was distrust between the Black community and the “man” – that did not mean you threw out the baby with the bath water.
or better yet in his words:

No… Before you come asking Mr. Muhammad does he teach hate,
you should ask yourself
who taught you to hate being what God made you.

Malcolm recognized that teaching hate instead of self-respect – encouraging blame was not a solution or a justification.

It is no accident that members of the Nation of Islam, as portrayed fairly accurately were always well-dressed, well-spoken – no street jive, no pride in poor grammar, and most of all no excuses. They expected their community to cooperate with them. AND, they expected members of the community they served to have enough self-respect and responsibility to maintain personal standards of decency.

They did not “go along to get along” they were proactive in seeking and obtaining results and choosing their battles. And quite frankly they did not much care who the “bad guys” were – if you were black and engaged in any form of criminal behavior you suffered the consequences. You were held responsible for their actions. Street Justice is often Blind Justice – maybe not the easiest to accept.

As a young blond white woman, I would have had no trepidation living in any of the housing complexes where the men who adhered to the Code of Behavior set forth by Malcolm. There was a time when I did and when that sense of community pride ceased to exist in favor of leaders who preached hate and disenfranchised the community by taking step infanticize its members, I moved.

Next stop was an area of the East Village – controlled by the Hell’s Angels, I had more issues with their style than that of Malcolm, but they also looked out for their neighbors. The life lesson learned during that time was that so long as you did not as a woman “join the culture” and become a passenger, but rode your own bike, you were reasonably safe. (well, it helped to have a “hollow leg” and a healthy dose of “control freak” so an aversion to drugs)

If a community choose to cooperate and take a proactive approach to solving its problems – the perception will be it gets better policing – not the reality that law enforcement does not exist in a vacum, and there are insufficient numbers for Cops to fill the void.

If a community refuses to cooperate in its own best interest – actually living by some sort of misguided street code encourage by divisionist – they get the chaos.

If the police are not TAUGHT to develop sources and then how to PROTECT – those sources cannot cooperate and it is not reasonable to expect them to do so.

It is no accident that NYC was spared some of the rioting of the 1968 – when Mayor John Lindsay walked his “white Irish Ass” into Harlem – the message was clear – he wanted to help better not oppress but to accomplish that the community had to trust him and he had to know he could trust them. I have always wondered if he wore, instead of a ring of body guards (yes they were there but very low key) or a “vest” but an adult diaper

And the community responded – its preacher did not seek to divide their community but preached for a greater long term good – it was an era when informants abounded in ALL the communities in NYC and as a result more of the real bad guys were taken off the streets.

NYC emerged – not unscathed – but certainly less so. Our courts certainly have a part to play and those who control the correction system need to do more than maintain calm. Society needs to again understand that infanticizomh leads to crime and corruption = teaching how to truly build self-respect and in turn how to keep it, giving respect when needed.

There is a lesson to be learned – bad things can happen to good people, but less so when the Police are allowed to do their job and when the Cooperation between Community & Cops makes the difference.

In his speech to the SNCC just weeks before his death –

“If I can’t live in the house as a human being, I’m praying for that house to blow down, I’m praying for a strong wind to come along.” “But,” Malcolm concluded, “if we are all going to live as human beings, as brothers, then I am for a society of human beings that can practice brotherhood.”

I am forever grateful for parents who did not condemn based on color but on performance and for the wonderful example set by our neighbors the Reverend and Mrs Seton and the conversations we had, and the people they introduced me to that so shaped many of my views on possible solutions.

I sincerely believe that were he with us today – Malcolm would identify the enemy as those who use oppress by “letting them eat cake” and not those who would prefer to enable not infanticize.

looking forward (I think) to your thoughts and maybe how you think each of us can act in our long term best interest to begin to make the changes needed.

No one is likely to call me shy aoout self promoting my little online business. It is a goal to make sure that when I do “in a group” that it is not shameless.

In other words, a question was asked, I provide an answer and since not everyone wants to read long answers, a link to more information.

Often these link to product information pages – because if I am providing support – then I should also get credit>
It is also because the same questions get asked over and over and I get lazy about retyping – so keeping the long answer on one place is a more efficient use of my time.

Okay, so this explains how I annoy others (and that I am aware of there seeming displeasure and apparent inability to use a delete or scroll key – their problem not mine)

What annoyance did I feel needed to be adapated into a goal.

When ANYONE asks a question in an open forum that is SPECIFIC to the work of a particular book, tutorial, etc and a different seller uses that for shameless self promotion by injecting links to THEIR product. As if to say, “sorry you made a poor buying choice – come buy mine and you will be happier.

And yes, there was a time when I did this and I am not proud of that and constantly work to control the temptation

Limiting this to “instructional material” If you are “among the guilty” – well not that my opinion matters, but such discourtesy annoys me and paints a picture of someone lacking respect, for themselves and others.

So if you catch me doing this – call me out
If you are right – then I will delete the comment
(excludes info page links)